How do you, or would you, deal with being misgendered?
I get misgendered on a daily basis. Some of it is because I don’t try to present as ‘male’ so people use female pronouns and see me as ‘female’. People who know I identify as genderqueer will use my preferred pronouns and see me as…well I assume as ‘me’, but who knows they could see me as male/female/both/neither. I also wonder because I do often feel I am neither male or female, but rather something in the middle, if I get misgendered purely because people do see me as female/male, but which in fact I am not… Confusing much?
How I deal with being misgendered is another story:
– If someone doesn’t know I am genderqueer and doesn’t know me I seemed to either not care OR get really annoyed.
– If someone doesn’t know I am genderqueer but does know me I get a little annoyed at their assumption.
– If someone knows I am genderqueer and knows me I get annoyed that they’ve made an assumption AND don’t know better.
Overall I pick my battles and correct people who I want to let into my life and leave the rest ignorant. Most of my friends are up to scratch and those who feel they’ve misgendered me, as long as you’ve asked me first I don’t honestly mind. I only don’t deal with people who make an assumption without asking me. Yes, I do use both pronouns and don’t try and pass as male, but that still doesn’t mean you have the right to put me in the ‘female’ box.